CHAOS

I have always used humor in uncomfortable situations. Whenever I am in a situation that creates some social discomfort regardless of if is my own discomfort or others around me,I find that I self deprecating humor often lightens the mood. I get this from my father, it’s not intentional really just something that we do though I am not nearly as good as he is. My Dad can lift a black cloud from a room in a matter of minutes but not in a knee slapping, joke telling sort of way. It is quite subtle, very smart and sometimes misunderstood. Having a good sense of humor is often the one distinction I use to determine my community. This mode of social interaction is lost online. It seems when I type something that I think is funny it reads sarcastic and sometimes even rude. I realize that it is more the face to face delivery that makes it funny. Not everyone appreciates humor and I have found that humor online particularly when it is dry is often NOT appreciated. So checking my humor at the door (for now) I entered an online community on my best behavior.

Nearly all of us who have been on the internet have participated at one time or another with an “imagined community” (p140). I have for the most part been a lurker as Michael Hauben would describe in chapter 6 of Woods and Smith. Usually I join a group that is about something specific to my work as I often interact with and offer guidance via some mode of mediated communication with people around the country. In these situations I have always felt like I have something valuable to contribute to the group, I have many years of experience in my field and feel that I can often offer my opinion. But it is just that……an opinion and everyone has one. Many virtual communities are very tight closed circles of people who often are so likeminded they do not appreciate any outside perspective or opposing opinions. There is a social order that seems to be based on how long you have been a member of the group and that order it is not necessarily based upon the accuracy of the information and are at times highly critical of a “newbie” with an opinion. I sat back and watched this dynamic and tried to learn my “place” as set out specifically to avoid the type of community that was too closed.

So a couple weeks ago I was going through my mail and I received a postcard from a local company called “Klutter Kleaner”. The card was about helping you get your life organized, asking “aren’t you tired of being buried under a mound of paperwork”. My first thought was….were they looking through my windows? It probably sounds incredibly boring to many but this postcard inspired me to see if there was an online community that would do just what the postcard offered. One that shared tips and tricks to help a busy, self employed, full time student and full time mother actually get organized. No surprise, there are in fact many groups to this affect. I settled in on a community that had……..again what I deem necessary in life… humor. The tag asked “Do you suffer from CHAOS (can’t have anyone over syndrome)”. One of the discussions was how often our procrastination is fueled by our perfectionism, and goes on to talk about how our perfectionism piggy-backed with procrastination can put us in a coma. I thought this was a great opener as it talked about how many of us are in a “perfect” rut and that rut can be paralyzing therefore, we don’t get as much done as we could. This is an incredibly easy group to assimilate into as the whole idea behind it is how to improve yourself and your environment. It has a very high level of interactivity and is very well organized. It is funny….in a self deprecating sort of way and I can honestly say that this is the first internet community I have joined that I could see myself actively participating in. Don’t get me wrong I remain a skeptic and don’t see myself becoming a fully fledged “Netizen” but for now I am just a happy “Newbie” participating in a fun group of busy women trying their best to “have it all”.